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    9/14/2009

    深夜无题

    常常教别人,面对同一件情境,可以用不同的心态去看待。所谓不同的心态,基本上分为正面与负面。正面的心态能让人达观,负面的心态却让人在伤口上撒把盐。
    说真的,我都还无法百分之百做到,即使与别人比较起来是花了许多的功夫去练习,却还是情不自禁的偶尔会往黑暗里钻。
    更何况那些缺乏练习的人们。

    十五岁的许多个夜晚,独自一人坐在高高的围墙上啜泣,为的只是不忍让妈妈与姐们看到我的落泪而伤心。
    大学时期的很多个必须参与的课堂,常常不忍拒绝帮同学的忙而跷课。
    二十几岁青春活跃的日子里,与朋友熬夜唱歌打牌,即使疲惫不堪却也不忍直言告别而扫他人之兴。
    宁可远离或转身不见,也不想让人难堪或别扭。
    不知道何时养成了这样的坏习惯?!违逆自己的意愿,只为了完成他人。总是这样想,自己简单方便些,免得让人尴尬或手足无措。麻烦他人,不如降低或灭绝自己的喜恶。如果问我吃不吃苹果?也会常常不想麻烦别人削皮而直接说不吃。
    曾经有朋友说我这样是太压抑?!其实,只是过多的为别人着想吧?!

    发了脾气却发现局面难以收拾,所以只好改改自己的脾气,或者自己躲起来捶墙嘶吼。
    与其面临窘境不知如何是好,不如练习为别人解闷排忧的能力好让自己舒心。
    拨切洋葱会流泪,干脆连洋葱都不让它出现,或者灭绝吃洋葱的任何机会。其实,拨切洋葱时,身边的人们也是会流泪的。
    年纪大的人保持运动的习惯,有时候不见得只是为了健康。有时候,只是想保持体力以免麻烦别人。也或许,不想让别人不忍心嫌弃你却反而让你感到无比的难堪。

    深夜的踱步,发散的思维,短暂的无限翱翔。

    Comments (4)

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    dinijunwrote:
    Hi .Joe
    有沒有發覺偶而看個電視劇 , 只要稍為感人一點.忽然間鼻頭酸了,眼眶也紅了,真的有歲了.
    Oct. 28
    Yutai Liuwrote:
    Hello, Jeff:

    I have nothing to say. If you do visit Texas, you are very welcome to visit me again (Los Angeles, California). Your last visit was more than 10 years ago.

    Take care.

    YL
    Oct. 19
    Huang Jeffwrote:
    It's so so so happy to read your comments here.I am ok,REALLY.I bet I would visit you and Jason someday.
    想来真是日月如梭啊,我们认识快20年啦?!?!晕~~~
    Anyway,谢谢你的关心与祝福,也希望你们夫妻俩一切顺利哦!!!
    Sept. 21
    Mei-Lengwrote:
    Hi Jooe,

    終於看到你的新文章,又可知你最近的心情,看了後又覺得一點難過只覺得我比你幸運許多,因為我比你早改變這種以優先考慮別人而把自己放在最後的生活個性習慣,這樣的個性對其他人來說是又愛又恨,但在愛與恨的衝擊之下,你才會發現誰才是你真正的知心朋友。

    "发了脾气却发现局面难以收拾,所以只好改改自己的脾气,或者自己躲起来捶墙嘶吼。",難以收拾真的是因為發了脾氣嗎?還是別的原因?找出真正的原因才能真的收拾發生的局面,局面收拾後就不用躲起来捶墙嘶吼了,你覺得呢?
    "与其面临窘境不知如何是好,不如练习为别人解闷排忧的能力好让自己舒心",這樣真的能讓你舒心嗎?你想要做的事是非常難的,因為你自己必須先有非常好的解悶排憂的管道,否則將一發不可收拾。我希望你能給自己時間好好的問自己,你能從一而終的做而不會有一丁點的抱怨嗎?面臨窘境只要練習誠實面對相信自己的直覺,相信窘境就會自然消失。(請相信我這個過來人的經驗吧)

    剛認識你的時候我才大學剛畢業,今年十月四日將是我打開四字頭的第一天,不覺得時間過的好快嗎?雖然我們很久沒見面,但我永遠記得你是一位好上司、好男人、好朋友、好老友。

    Please treat yourself nice because you deserve it! Why don't you give yourself a vacation and come to visit Me and Jason in Texas, I am a good trip planner now and can plan a scenic drive and hiking trip for us to enjoy the life in our forties!

    your old old friends in Texas
    Jason and Mei-Leng
    Sept. 18

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